In recent times, BDSM session sadomasochism has returned to the scene, with the appearance of the literary trilogy Fifty Shades of Gray . But do you know exactly what the practice is and what it consists of? Are you ready to do it? Would you like but do not know where to start? Does the fact that it could be dangerous cause doubt? 

In the first place we are going to delve into the term that is made up of two words: sado, which derives from sadism, and masochism, which refers to the famous writer BDSM session Donatien Alphonse François, popularly known as the Marquis de Sade, who introduced in some of his erotic literary works to characters who found sexual excitement and pleasure by causing pain and humiliation in others. 

However, it is necessary to clarify that its exercise is far from criminal sadism, since the sadomasochistic practice promotes a free, full and informed enjoyment of the participants who find pleasure in pain and domination by consensus and with limits. 

Later in history, it also gained popularity as BDSM session; four letters referring to various sexual practices: bondage; discipline and domination; submission and sadism and masochism. 

In this regard, many sexuality specialists who have studied the practice highlighted that, far from what is popularly believed, sadomasochism as a sexual habit is totally valid and does not refer to any type of disorder. 

In this sense, the book Diagnostic and Statistical of Mental Disorders, from the American Psychiatric Association, considers BDSM session as a paraphilia, that is, "a pattern of sexual behavior in which the predominant source of pleasure is found in atypical objects, situations, activities, or individuals." And it only classifies it as a disorder "in the event that it produces stress or harms the lives of those who carry it out." 

On the other hand, a study carried out in 2013 by Tilburg University, the University of the Netherlands, showed that "BDSM devotees did not present mental disorders, but, on the contrary, showed slightly better well-being than people who don't do that sexual practice. "

However, as many specialists express, whether it is taken as a sporadic practice, a condiment to break the routine or a lifestyle, it must always be carried out respecting its main premise: "Safe, sensible and consensual", since that "the essential thing is that sadomasochism is not confused with acts of sexual assault. Those who practice it seek pain and humiliation in the context of love and sex; they do not do so in other situations and do not practice simple violence without restrictions or with abuse. " 

In this note, La Tecla debunks the myths surrounding a universe that still remains a taboo. 

A code-based experience

Starting from its genesis, BDSM session promotes a free, full and informed enjoyment of the participants; reason why its exercise must be consensual and have clearly established limits. 

Firstly, it is important that both parties agree on the terms of the practice, that is, to what extent and when to stop. 

In the second order, it will be extremely key for the couple to establish a known and delimited word to be used in case the degree of action exerted by the dominator is causing pain instead of pleasure. 

Finally, it is necessary to know that one can participate in two ways: as master, that is, who guides, arranges and commands; or as a submissive, who receives orders and obeys them. These roles are not fixed, they can be exchanged in the sessions (switch). 

Where to start?

As with the exercise of intimacy in general, there are no recipes; but unlike conventional sex, sadomasochism requires code-based preparation. Once established, you are ready to go. 

However, it is recommended to always go little by little, that is, from low to high. 

This is a practice that requires trust and dedication, so it is key to put prejudice aside and be with all the senses.

To get started, the most common practices are: sensory deprivation, immobilization and spanking. Regarding them, it should be noted that not seeing or hearing increases bodily sensations; that for immobilization you can use ties, since at first it will be enough to have the feeling of not being able to free yourself; and that for spanking, the ideal would be to start with a gentle spanking. 

Conventional

clothing The most traditional clothing  

BDSM sessions usually have materials such as latex, leather, vinyl or PVC as a common factor. It is that these make clothing, nudity; that is, they simulate and symbolize the bare skin itself, highlighting the figure. Another fairly common option is hot underwear, which includes garters, fishnets and corsets. 

Toys for beginners

It can be said that sex toys are almost indispensable in sadomasochistic sessions. And it should be noted that there are for all tastes and levels. 

For starters, the most convenient are masks, handcuffs, whips and whips, and nipple clamps. They all come in a wide variety of models and there are more "friendly" aesthetics. 

The premise is the guide

"Safe, sensible and consensual" is the premise of BDSM. So if you want to carry out this practice, it will be essential that you first openly discuss it with your partner and then investigate and investigate so that it is a safe experience.